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Aside the futile concept of the quarantine, the software designers of the online declaration have indulged in a spot of nostalgia with the return of countries that haven't existed for many years. Anyone from East Germany should make sure they fill it in correctly else they may get a 'visit' in...

Indeed. The way the crisis has been handled hasn't gone unnoticed in other parts of Europe. A German current affairs show ran a feature last week on the Cummings saga and Johnson in general. At the end, the main presenter gave a little roll of the eyes and a wry smile with a quip about a blind...

Probably the first and last time I will agree with Michael O'Leary. (link below) You could be anywhere should the Home Office contact you. There is even an option on the declaration for only being contacted by SMS! (I took a test drive of the declaration to test my eyesight) An ITV London...